Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.
Have I Failed as a Christian Parent?
“For not even His brothers believed in Him.” (John 7:5 NIV)
When Those Closest to Jesus Did Not Believe
John 7:5 may be one of the more shocking verses in the Bible. We know that the church authorities did not believe in Jesus and, when given the opportunity to free a prisoner at Passover, the crowd chose Barabbas over Jesus.
However, what about His own family?
His brothers, James, Joseph (or Joses), Simon, and Judas (Jude), grew up with Jesus. They watched Him grow in the Spirit, heard Him talk, and witnessed His miracles during His public ministry. They knew that His public ministry and private life were both pure; His life was Holy, and yet they did not believe.
The non-belief of His brothers tells us something about the human heart.
Spiritual privilege is not the same thing as a spiritual life. You can have the privilege of growing up in a Christian home, regularly attend church, know the Bible, and live around godly people but remain spiritually dead.
The problem is deeper than environment, education, or exposure.
We need regeneration.
If physical proximity could regenerate a man, then His brothers would have believed immediately. Proximity cannot create life. Only the Spirit can do this.
This is the grace of our Lord.
When Your Child Does Not Believe in God
For Christian parents, an unbelieving child can raise a painful question: Have I failed?
Our responsibility as parents is faithfulness. We can teach our children Scripture, bring them to church, pray over them, and model faith and godly living. However, we cannot create saving faith in another person. That work belongs to God.
This is an important lesson for all parents.
We want our children to believe. We teach them Scripture, bring them to Sunday school and church, and pray over them. We model faith and godly living.
All of this is good, and we should continue, but none of us can regenerate our children.
We cannot parent a child of any age into the kingdom. We cannot force anyone to die to self and choose Christ.
Philippians 2:12 addresses this by teaching, “Continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill His good purpose” (emphasis added).
Each one of us is ultimately responsible for our own salvation.
I cannot work out your salvation, nor you mine.
Our Job as Christian Parents Is Faithfulness
Our job as a parent is faithfulness.
God has done His job through the blood of the Son.
This truth should not make us passive but should encourage us to lean into prayer.
If salvation depended upon our education, skill, consistency, perfection, or persuasion, we would have good reason to despair.
As with all things, salvation belongs to the Lord.
Christ knew the ache of having people close to Him who did not believe. If you have children or other family members who remain unbelieving, Jesus knows that sorrow.
Their lack of faith is not a failure on our part, but rather should serve to motivate our prayers to our Lord.
Trust God While You Wait
All things are possible through Christ.
The Spirit can do in a second what we cannot in a lifetime.
The Psalmist wrote in Psalm 27:14, “Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.”
God acts in the Perfect way, at the Perfect time, and in the Perfect manner.
Be still and wait.
As we wait for the Lord, we keep loving, keep speaking words of affirmation, keep blessing, and keep trusting.
Putting It Into Practice
Reflection
Am I praying with confidence and thanksgiving that at the right time the Spirit will touch the heart of my child to encourage them to turn to Him and into a new life?
The Right Next Step
Remain faithful in prayer and modeling the peace and joy of a life lived in and for God.
Prayer: Dear God, Thank You for the blessing of children. Strengthen us as we grow weary in our ministry to them. Send Your Spirit to speak words of Truth and Love to them through us. Amen.
Frequently Asked Questions About Praying for an Unbelieving Child
Have I failed as a Christian parent if my child does not believe?
A child’s lack of faith does not necessarily mean that a Christian parent has failed. Parents can faithfully teach Scripture, model godly living, and pray, but they cannot create saving faith in another person. Our responsibility is faithfulness while trusting God with the outcome.
What should Christian parents do when a child does not believe in God?
Continue to love, pray, bless, and model the peace and joy of a life lived for God. Todd reminds parents that waiting on the Lord is not passive. It is an opportunity to remain faithful while trusting the work of the Holy Spirit.
Can parents make their children become Christians?
Parents can teach, encourage, pray, and model Christian faith, but they cannot regenerate another person. As Todd writes, “Proximity cannot create life. Only the Spirit can do this.”
Meet the Author
Todd Shupe is a Certified Lay Minister and Men’s Ministry Specialist through Francis Asbury Methodist Church in Baton Rouge, LA. He is a Board Member for Gulf South Men, an Action Team member for The Kingdom Group, and a Board Member for the Lagniappe Country Walk to Emmaus. Todd is a contributor to Project XII and Baton Rouge Parents Magazine. He is a Past President of the Baton Rouge District of United Methodist Men and remains active in this and many other local, regional, and international ministries. Additionally, he’s the author of the inspiring book “Fathering A Special Needs Child.” Todd also enjoys filling the pulpit to share the Good News of our Lord and Savior. Todd is the proud father of Emma and Kyle and resides in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.
We welcome your comments below.
Liked this post?
Read more below or search for more topics...
-
Who Do You Listen To?
Who Do You Listen To? "Listen and hear my voice; pay attention and hear what I say" (Isaiah 28:23 NIV). Listening is essential to learning. I hear many voices, especially on television, but I don’t really listen to them. I hear them but am not listening. I feel that much, if not all, of what they have to say is not important and/or is too depressing or divisive. The story of The Transfiguration in Matthew 17 is a powerful reminder of the importance to listen to Jesus. “After six days Jesus took with him Peter, James and John the brother of James, and led... -
Finding Purpose Beyond Work
Finding Purpose Beyond Work Scripture: “May the favor of the Lord our God rest on us; establish the work of our hands for us— yes, establish the work of our hands (Psalm 90:17 NIV).Work, Identity, and the Question of PurposeOver the years, I have seen many men retire and then rapidly begin to experience a decline in their health. They enjoyed their work, and the job became part of their identity. They felt the favor of the Lord was upon their hands in their work, particularly in their work and nothing else.Now, once they are retired, they feel lost. If they... -
Finding Destiny In Disappointment
Finding Destiny In Disappointment "The LORD is close to those who have suffered disappointment. He saves those who are discouraged" (Psalm 34:18-19 ERV). You might have seen the above Scripture before worded slightly different with the words “broken-hearted” in place of “those who have suffered disappointment.” I like the ERV translation because it uses a word that resonates with me, and perhaps you, “disappointment.” I fear that some of us have been so familiar with disappointment, that it no longer manifests as “broken heartedness.” Instead, we lower our expectations of ourselves and others to avoid disappointment. I recall as a child overhearing an...