I think it is important to understand that our God is a God of boundaries.  He has established boundaries on us and very likely understands the need for us to establish boundaries on others if we are to love ourselves as we love Him.  We can, and should, still love those in our life with whom we have placed boundaries, but now we do so in a different manner.  One that is healthy for all parties and respects and honors God. 

Some of us do not honor the speed limit, and the consequence of failing to obey that boundary is a speeding ticket.  It is natural to try to blame “the system” for the ticket but the real fact is we were speeding, we failed to honor the boundary, and we will suffer the consequences.  In rural areas, a no trespassing sign is fairly common.  The landowner is not a donkey because he wants to keep people off of his land.  The property line is the boundary.  Your trespassing, and disregard of boundaries, is done at your peril.

If a person has established a boundary in their life it is probably not because they have a desire to control somebody else.  More likely, they do have a very strong desire to enforce a boundary around the things that they hold dear, which is likely their family, their self, their ministry, and their work.   The boundary was likely instilled because somebody in word or action became a threat. Lysa wrote in her book, “Remember all the work you’ve done to draw boundaries was not about controlling someone else’s behavior. It’s about paying attention and being honest about how someone’s poor behavior and lack of responsibility is possibly controlling you. And when people close to us are acting out of control, that’s when we run the greater risk of lacking self-control. When a relationship shifts from being difficult to being destructive, it’s the right time to consider a goodbye.”

So, if we feel compelled to label the boundary setter “a donkey, unchristian, mean, controlling, psycho, etc.” because they have established a boundary and we are unwilling and/or unable to respect that boundary, then perhaps it is time for us to entertain the possibility that the true “donkey” is the one looking at us in the mirror.  Perhaps it is now time for us to do one of the most difficult, most necessary, and also most rewarding tasks that we can do as a human.  It is time to find our quiet place and invite the Holy Spirit in to search us and reveal to us all of the many times that we have failed to respect and honor this other person, and consequently have failed to respect and honor our Lord and Savior.   If this process cannot be done honestly and sincerely, then there is no need to do it.  Also, if this process is attempted without the invitation and presence of the Holy Spirit, there is no need to do it.  This is an important process, a sacred process.  This is part of our pruning and sanctification.  This is a task on our own personal road to Damascus.

Prayer:  Dear God, Thank you for the boundaries that you have placed in our lives as we know that they are for our own good.  Forgive us for the times in which we fall short of honoring your boundaries and when we fail to honor the boundaries of others.  Amen.