Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.
The Ministry of Presence
“Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words” Job 2:13 (NLT).
This is certainly not a news flash, but people are always in a hurry. We rush to work, ball games, and even to church.
But if we are always in a hurry, then we will miss opportunities to be a good listener because listening requires time, focus, and listening. When we are always in a rush, we are unable to have good conversations, and we certainly cannot be an active listener to a friend or to the still small Voice of our Lord.
Job was a wealthy man in the Bible who lost virtually everything, including his money, health, and even his children. “When three of Job’s friends heard of the tragedy he had suffered, they got together and traveled from their homes to comfort and console him. . . . Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words” (Job 2:11, 13).
This is called the ministry of presence. When we are ministering to someone in pain, we must remember this: The deeper the pain, the fewer words you use. If somebody’s cranky due to a flat tire, then you can talk about it for 30 minutes or so. But if that person has a major crisis, talking about it for a long time is probably not going to help.
A lot of people don’t know how to help someone who is in crisis. They don’t know what to say.
Those same people will often stay away from a friend because they’re afraid of saying the wrong thing.
The truth is that we don’t need to say anything. Just show up and be present. I have participated in a prison ministry before and the goal of the team was to “listen, listen, love, love.”
You can’t talk people out of their pain. Job’s friends realized that some pain is beyond words. When it’s the right time, your hurting friend will say something. When it’s the right time, then you’ll be able to say something too.
This kind of investment takes time. Notice how many days Job’s friends sat on the ground with him: seven. Do you have anybody in your life who’d sit on the ground with you for seven days without saying anything? That takes a very mature person and a true friend.
If you want to be that kind of friend, then you have to be willing to sacrifice so that you can give people your love, attention, and presence.
The Emotional Bank Account is a metaphor coined by Stephen Covey in his renowned book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, to describe the level of trust in a relationship. It represents the amount of trust that has been built up, or eroded, in a relationship, essentially the “hidden wealth” of trust that determines how well two people can communicate and collaborate.
Another term I have heard is “foxhole.” Specifically, I recall a speaker at an Iron Sharpens Iron Men’s Equipping Conference ask the audience, “Who is in your foxhole?”
Perhaps the best way to describe this is from Proverbs 17:17. “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.” It is a blessing to have friends and brothers in our lives to share our burdens and celebrate our joys. If you don’t have a friend, take the first step and be a friend to make a friend, join a local men’s ministry, and talk to your pastor.
Prayer: Thank you for the friends and brothers that you put in our lives. May we be present with them in their hour of need and they with us in our hour. And may your Spirit be present and Your name glorified in all of our interactions. Amen.
Meet the Author
Todd Shupe is a Certified Lay Minister and Men’s Ministry Specialist through Francis Asbury Methodist Church in Baton Rouge, LA. He is a Board Member for Gulf South Men, an Action Team member for The Kingdom Group, and a Board Member for the Lagniappe Country Walk to Emmaus. Todd is a contributor to Project XII and Baton Rouge Parents Magazine. He is a Past President of the Baton Rouge District of United Methodist Men and remains active in this and many other local, regional, and international ministries. Additionally, he’s the author of the inspiring book “Fathering A Special Needs Child.” Todd also enjoys filling the pulpit to share the Good News of our Lord and Savior. Todd is the proud father of Emma and Kyle and resides in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.
We welcome your comments below.
Liked this post?
Read more below or search for more topics...
-
Healing A Broken Spirit
Healing A Broken Spirit “A broken spirit who can bear it?” (Proverbs 18:14 NASB). One of the many names for Jesus was The Great Physician. His fingerprints are evident every day when people are healed of terrible diseases. The healing may come in the form of restoration of our current life or renewal to an enteral life in His presence.One area that medicine cannot heal is a broken spirit. We have wonderful counselors and medications for mental health that can be helpful, and I would never diminish the benefit of mental health professionals and medication. It may appear that these medications and... -
Purpose
Purpose “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and He will establish your plans” (Proverbs 16:3 NIV). Planning is critical in life. Financial planners help us get our financial matters in order and plan for retirement. Doctors help us by establish a wellness plan when we are sick. Business leaders make plans to bring a profit to the shareholders. Our pastors help us to make plans that will bring honor and glory to God. We plan to accommodate our priorities. A priority is a value, goal, relationship, or cause of leading importance in your life: something for which you live, the shaping... -
Leaving A Truly Lasting Legacy
Leaving A Truly Lasting Legacy “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6 NIV). I think most of us are interested in leaving behind a “legacy.” I see this “legacy” term used in many applications. Non-profit religious and secular organizations often court donors to donate money to establish a “legacy.” This concept of having something, particularly something intrinsically good, that lives on after we are forever healed is appealing to most men. Your legacy is not contingent on the amount of money that you donate to any organization,...