The Ministry of Presence

“Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words” Job 2:13 (NLT).

This is certainly not a news flash, but people are always in a hurry. We rush to work, ball games, and even to church.

But if we are always in a hurry, then we will miss opportunities to be a good listener because listening requires time, focus, and listening. When we are always in a rush, we are unable to have good conversations, and we certainly cannot be an active listener to a friend or to the still small Voice of our Lord.

Job was a wealthy man in the Bible who lost virtually everything, including his money, health, and even his children. “When three of Job’s friends heard of the tragedy he had suffered, they got together and traveled from their homes to comfort and console him. . . . Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words” (Job 2:11, 13).

This is called the ministry of presence. When we are ministering to someone in pain, we must remember this: The deeper the pain, the fewer words you use. If somebody’s cranky due to a flat tire, then you can talk about it for 30 minutes or so. But if that person has a major crisis, talking about it for a long time is probably not going to help.

A lot of people don’t know how to help someone who is in crisis. They don’t know what to say.

Those same people will often stay away from a friend because they’re afraid of saying the wrong thing.

The truth is that we don’t need to say anything. Just show up and be present. I have participated in a prison ministry before and the goal of the team was to “listen, listen, love, love.”

You can’t talk people out of their pain. Job’s friends realized that some pain is beyond words. When it’s the right time, your hurting friend will say something. When it’s the right time, then you’ll be able to say something too.

This kind of investment takes time. Notice how many days Job’s friends sat on the ground with him: seven. Do you have anybody in your life who’d sit on the ground with you for seven days without saying anything? That takes a very mature person and a true friend.

If you want to be that kind of friend, then you have to be willing to sacrifice so that you can give people your love, attention, and presence.

The Emotional Bank Account is a metaphor coined by Stephen Covey in his renowned book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, to describe the level of trust in a relationship. It represents the amount of trust that has been built up, or eroded, in a relationship, essentially the “hidden wealth” of trust that determines how well two people can communicate and collaborate.

Another term I have heard is “foxhole.” Specifically, I recall a speaker at an Iron Sharpens Iron Men’s Equipping Conference ask the audience, “Who is in your foxhole?”

Perhaps the best way to describe this is from Proverbs 17:17. “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.” It is a blessing to have friends and brothers in our lives to share our burdens and celebrate our joys. If you don’t have a friend, take the first step and be a friend to make a friend, join a local men’s ministry, and talk to your pastor.

Prayer: Thank you for the friends and brothers that you put in our lives. May we be present with them in their hour of need and they with us in our hour. And may your Spirit be present and Your name glorified in all of our interactions. Amen.

Meet the Author

Todd Shupe is a Certified Lay Minister and Men’s Ministry Specialist through Francis Asbury Methodist Church in Baton Rouge, LA. He is a Board Member for Gulf South Men, an Action Team member for The Kingdom Group, and a Board Member for the Lagniappe Country Walk to Emmaus. Todd is a contributor to Project XII and Baton Rouge Parents Magazine. He is a Past President of the Baton Rouge District of United Methodist Men and remains active in this and many other local, regional, and international ministries. Additionally, he’s the author of the inspiring book “Fathering A Special Needs Child.” Todd also enjoys filling the pulpit to share the Good News of our Lord and Savior. Todd is the proud father of Emma and Kyle and resides in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

Finding Purpose Beyond Work

Scripture: “May the favor of the Lord our God rest on us; establish the work of our hands for us— yes, establish the work of our hands (Psalm 90:17 NIV).

Work, Identity, and the Question of Purpose

Over the years, I have seen many men retire and then rapidly begin to experience a decline in their health. They enjoyed their work, and the job became part of their identity. They felt the favor of the Lord was upon their hands in their work, particularly in their work and nothing else.

Now, once they are retired, they feel lost. If they don’t have to go to work, some will ask, “What is my purpose?”

A Man’s Deep Desires: Insights from Wild at Heart

In Wild at Heart, John Eldredge argues that every man deeply desires three things to feel truly alive and fulfill his masculine purpose: a battle to fight, an adventure to live, and a beauty to rescue. These core needs are designed to help men move past passive “nice guy” stereotypes and embrace their strength.

He argues that men often seek validation in venues such as work. However, in each item listed below each man can fulfill his purpose in venues outside of work.

A Battle to Fight

Men need a purpose, mission, or cause that challenges them, allowing them to use their strength to fight against evil.

An Adventure to Live

Men need risk and challenge to test their spirit and strength, preventing the boredom that leads to stagnation and addiction.

A Beauty to Rescue

Men are driven to protect, cherish, and fight for a woman or something or someone vulnerable, offering their strength to make another’s life better.

Each of these activities are intended for a man to fulfill his masculine purpose.

A Broader Framework for Purpose: A Purpose-Driven Life

As I ponder on “purpose” my mind is drawn to another excellent book, A Purpose Driven Life by Rev. Rick Warren.

The book is intended to be read as a daily inspiration, with each of the 40 short chapters read on consecutive days. Each chapter contains a personal application section at the end with a “point to ponder,” a verse to remember, and a question to consider over the course of that day.

Rick Warren described his book as an “anti-self-help book.” The first sentence of the book reads, “It’s not about you,” and the remainder of the chapter goes on to explain how the quest for personal fulfillment, satisfaction, and meaning can only be found in understanding and doing what God placed you on Earth to do.

The book’s 40 chapters are divided into six major sections:

- - - What on Earth Am I Here For?
    - Purpose #1: You Were Planned for God’s Pleasure (Christian Worship)
    - Purpose #2: You Were Formed for God’s Family (Christian Fellowship)
    - Purpose #3: You Were Created to Become Like Christ (Discipleship)
    - Purpose #4: You Were Shaped for Serving God (Christian Ministry)
    - Purpose #5: You Were Made for a Mission (Christian Mission)

In later versions of the book, two additional chapters were added about the two biggest reasons why Christians do not live purpose-driven lives: envy and “people pleasing.”

Integrating Both Perspectives

Rev. Warren lays out several purposes for men in all stages of life. Each of the three things that Eldredge mentions that men need can feed into the five purposes identified by Rev. Warren.

For example, I have a young lady in my life that I adore. She is my “Beauty to Rescue.” I am driven to protect, cherish, and fight for her because she is valuable in my eye. She is my Proverbs 31 and “brings me good, not harm.”

A Call to Action

I encourage all men to buy these books and pray how the message of each book can be applied in their life. I pray that all men find their purpose and that the favor of our Lord be upon that work.

In addition, I encourage all men to consider male-only retreats such as “One Life To Life,” which are designed to help men identify and craft a plan to truly execute their life purpose with success.

I pray that all men find their purpose and that the favor of our Lord be upon that work.

Prayer

Dear God,

We know that we are each unique members of the Body of Christ, but we sometimes struggle to find our identity. Help us find our battle to fight, our adventure to live, and the beauty to rescue. And God help us to find our purpose in worship, fellowship, discipleship, ministry, and mission. We seek to glorify you with Your work that builds up our families, churches, and the world.

We pray all of these names in the precious Name of Jesus. Amen.

Meet the Author

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

Showing God on Valentine’s Day

Showing God on Valentine's Day

“Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love” (1 John 4:7-8. ESV).

Valentine’s Day, also called Saint Valentine’s Day or the Feast of Saint Valentine, is celebrated annually on February 14. It originated as a Christian feast day honoring a martyr named Valentine, and through later folk traditions it has also become a significant cultural, religious and commercial celebration of romance and love in many regions of the world.

As the calendar turns to February, we often think of the perfect present to give our loved one. Perhaps a nice dinner, flowers, jewelry, or chocolate is the choice to show our love.

Receiving gifts might be the preferred language of the recipient. However, Valentine’s Day provides men with the opportunity to go one step further beyond a secular holiday. If the basic premise of Valentine’s Day is love and since God is love as we known from the feature Scriptuire above, then Valentine’s Day gives men a unique opportunity to go the additional step and show love (and God) to their wife or significant other.

Scripture is useful in understanding the Nature of our Lord and Savior. Perhaps none are more useful in this regard than 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 which teaches us about love and therefore the Heart of God. It reads, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.”

A wise man will take these Holy words to heart and commit them to action on Valentine’s Day AND each day of the year. This is the pathway by which men can love their wife or significant other as Christ so loved His church.

Valentine’s Day is a great day about love as an emotion and feeling and giving gifts of affection is a wonderful thing! As a Christian man, each day should be a day about love as an action as described above in 1 Corinthians.

The right next step is to read the 1 Corinthians Scripture and substitute your name in place of the word “love.” Then, the final and most critical step is implementation of what you just read about yourself. Enjoy Valentines Day and be sure to model the love of God on this day and every day.

Prayer: Thank you for showing us true Love as manifested in the Body and Blood of Your Son. Help us, dear God, to each day show Your love to the women that You have placed in our lives. Amen.

Meet the Author

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

What Is The Best Christmas Present?

“For to us a Child is born, to us a Son is given, and the government will be on His shoulders. And He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace”
(Isaiah 9:6, NIV).

As a young boy, I loved looking at the presents sitting under the tree and guessing what was inside the boxes. My “love language” was gifts, particularly receiving gifts. As an older man, I get much, much more joy in giving gifts than receiving gifts. Now, my favorite gift to receive is time spent with a loved one or friend. I can always make more money, but the most precious gift that we can give or receive is the finite, precious commodity of time.

I will always love Christmas and the Advent season. It is a special time of year for children, families, and the church. The Advent season allows us to prepare our hearts for the birth of the Christ child. I also love all the traditions that come with Christmas — decorating the tree with ornaments that have been passed down from generations, giving and receiving presents, candlelight service at church on Christmas Eve, the smell of gingerbread baking, a fresh pine tree in the house, Christmas songs in the background, and the anticipation of Christmas Day.

The Nativity Story

One of the traditions of Christmas is the Nativity story. The New Testament contains two Christmas stories — they appear in Matthew 1–2 and Luke 1–2. In the familiar version of the Christmas story, Mary and Joseph travel from Nazareth to Bethlehem. Because there was no room in the inn, the baby Jesus is born in a stable and placed in a manger. It is important to tell the Nativity story each year to help us better understand the Christ portion of Christmas, which is the reason for Christmas.

The Greatest Gift

I think as fathers and priests of our houses, we should also use our time to teach our children about the best Christmas present ever — the blood of Christ on the cross at Calvary. Perhaps the best-known Bible verse is John 3:16, which reads:

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

We are reconciled to the Father by His gift of His Son. God has provided us a path for forgiveness of sins that leads to life everlasting and salvation. We do not deserve this, but we receive it as the ultimate blessing.

“Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.”
(Ephesians 2:9)

The Gift of Time

Before Jesus laid down His life for us, He gave us His time for approximately three years after He began His public ministry until He rejoined the Father. He walked and talked with us. He opened the eyes of the travelers to Emmaus, healed the blind and lame, and raised up disciples to start His church. We can show the love of Jesus by giving our time as well.

Time is a precious gift from God. Scripture teaches that human life and time on Earth are finite and fleeting. James 4:14 compares life to “a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” This perspective encourages believers to use their time intentionally and with a heavenly focus.

Closing Reflection

This Advent season, I encourage you to cherish your family, attend church services, and enjoy all the special traditions that make your family unique. Share your time with your family and tell your children or grandchildren the Nativity story — but also tell them that Jesus is the best present. A life lived in Him and for Him will help build His kingdom on earth and will lead to life everlasting. Now that is a gift, and the price has already been paid!

Prayer: Dear God, Thank You for sending Your Son to earth. Thank You for giving us the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Help keep us mindful that His blood is the most precious gift that we can ever receive. Amen.

Meet the Author

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

Here I Am

“The boy Samuel ministered before the Lord under Eli. In those days the word of the Lord was rare; there were not many visions. One night Eli, whose eyes were becoming so weak that he could barely see, was lying down in his usual place. The lamp of God had not yet gone out, and Samuel was lying down in the house of the Lord, where the ark of God was. Then the LORD called Samuel. Samuel answered, ‘Here I am.’ And he ran to Eli and said, ‘Here I am; you called me.’ But Eli said, ‘I did not call; go back and lie down.’ So he went and lay down. Again the Lord called, ‘Samuel!’ And Samuel got up and went to Eli and said, ‘Here I am; you called me.’ ‘My son,’ Eli said, ‘I did not call; go back and lie down.’ Now Samuel did not yet know the Lord: The Word of the Lord had not yet been revealed to him.A third time the Lord called, ‘Samuel!’ And Samuel got up and went to Eli and said, ‘Here I am; you called me.’ Then Eli realized that the Lord was calling the boy. So Eli told Samuel, ‘Go and lie down, and if he calls you, say, “Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening.” So Samuel went and lay down in his place. The Lord came and stood there, calling as at the other times, ‘Samuel! Samuel!’ Then Samuel said, ‘Speak, for your servant is listening’” (1 Samuel 3:1-10 NIV).

I think the above passage is one of the more powerful in the Bible. I can close my eyes and imagine the scenario playing out. Here is the young Eli whose mother Hannah had given her son to the prophet Samuel to raise in the tabernacle. Eli does not know much about the Lord, certainly not the Lord’s Voice was calling him. However, with the help of the older and wiser Samuel, he finally answers the Voice.

For me, there are several important lessons here.

First, the Lord can call and use anybody at any time. Eli did not know the Lord, but much more importantly the Lord knew Eli.

Second, our Lord is one of second chances. The Lord continues to give Eli opportunities to respond.

Third, Eli showed wisdom by obeying his elder and appropriately answering the Voice with the words, “Here I am Lord.” This young boy modelled for us today the correct answer to a Calling from God.

As it turns out, several people in the Bible well called by God and answered with either “Here I Am” or “Here am I.” I encourage you to visit the six other examples listed below.

Abraham — Genesis 22:1 and 11
Jacob —— Genesis 31:11 and 46:2
Moses—— Exodus 3:4
Samuel—– I Samuel 3:4, 5, 6, 8
Isaiah——- Isaiah 6:8
Ananias—- Acts 9:10

God is still in the business of Calling people. Through our baptism and public profession of faith, you and I have been called by the Lord into ministry. It may or may not be pastoral ministry but all ministry in the Body of Christ is important.

Let’s now return to God repeatedly calling Eli. We know that repetition is a sign of importance in the Bible. For example, after the death of Moses, God repeatedly instructed Joshua to be brave and courageous in leading the people of Israel into Canaan, the promised land.

Our call to action today is to pray, read Scripture, and invite the Holy Spirit to reveal to us any repeated call from our Lord that we have yet to hear. Be assured, if God called once He will continue to call until we answer on this fallen earth or in Glory.

Prayer: Dear God, Thank you for the examples of Scripture in which you repeatedly call to us. Thank you for giving us confidence in the present because you have used the least of our ancestors in the past. Dear good and gracious God, continue to seek us and call us as we continue to seek You. Grant us the wisdom, discernment, and courage to not only hear Your Voice but to appropriately respond, “Here I am.” Amen.

Meet the Author

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

Heart and Tongue

“A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” (Luke 6:45 NIV).

There are perhaps many reasons why God gave us tongues. Clearly, we need tongues to communicate with each other and to taste and swallow, but perhaps there is a deeper reason. Maybe we have tongues because we were made in His image, and He used His tongue to speak in the Bible.

God spoke audibly three times in Jesus’ life, and in each case pointed to Jesus.

1) “This is my beloved son in whom I am well pleased.” Baptism, (Mark 1:11).

2) “This is my Son listen to Him.” Transfiguration, (Matthew 17:5).

3) “I have glorified your Name and will do it again.” Last week of His life, (John 12:28).

However, God did not wait until the Gospels to speak. The Creation story of Genesis 1 is one of God speaking and creating. Genesis 1:3 reads, “And God said, Let there be light: and there was light (emphasis added).” Later when Adam was formed, God brought the rest of the creatures before him so he could “name” them with his tongue. Later, Adam “heard God’s voice in the garden” (Genesis 3:10).

Proverbs 18:21 teaches, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.” Our tongues are so powerful that they can build up or tear down others. James 3:11 uses the example of a fountain to illustrate the inconsistency of praising God and cursing people, both coming from the same mouth. It emphasizes that just as a spring doesn’t produce both sweet and bitter water from the same opening, our mouths should not speak both blessings and curses.

The happiest people I know are not the richest or the healthiest, but they all use their tongues to bless others and praise God. The “lens” by which they see the world is shaped by the words that they use to describe it.

As what I always tell myself: If you get what you want, that is God’s direction. If you do not get what you want, that is God’s protection. You may not understand His ways, but you just have to trust His will. So, the next time things don’t go your way, always remember that you are being redirected to something better.”

I think this is a great story and raises a very interesting proposition for us all to consider the next time we are inconvenienced. The temptation for some may be to intentionally leave late for a meeting and then “assume” that God has saved them from some unseen tragedy if they had left on time. This approach does little to honor God.

Speak words of life over your family, children, neighbors, co-workers, and yourself. Now, you are using your tongue’s power to shift your life’s atmosphere. Men, use your tongues to bless and affirm your children and wife.

The tongue is powerful! Jesus told us to “speak to the mountain,” and it would be removed and cast into the sea. Imagine the raw power in the tongue! What a gift God has given us to change our current perspective and future destiny. Turn your tongue loose on your mountain. Jesus spoke to storms, demons, and even cursed a fig tree. He even said that the stones could cry out. Release the power of words to bring life and enhance life.

Our tongues allow us to connect to God. God loves for our tongues to sing, worship, and bless His Name. On the day of Pentecost, He even gave the disciples a “new tongue” to speak the “wonderful works of God!” (Acts 2:11). Then in Acts 3, Peter used his tongue to heal a lame beggar by saying, “Silver or gold I do not have, but what I do have I give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk (Acts 3:6).

If you want to change your words, then begin by inviting the Holy Spirit to change your heart. A daily prayer of mine is Psalm 51:10, “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.”

The heart of the issue is the heart. Scripture is rich regarding the connection between our hearts, mouths, and life. Two of my favorites verses are, “Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34), and “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life (Proverbs 4:23).

So, what is the right next step? Ask the Lord to change your heart. Pray Psalm 51:10 and give thanks in advance for the change that is coming. Your heart will change, and you will be speaking words of life and thanksgiving and be a blessing to others. Perhaps this is why we have tongues? Let’s use ours to a blessing to others.

Prayer: Dear God, Thank you for blessing us with tongues. Send your Holy Spirit to guide us to use our tongues to speak words of life. Help us to use our tongues to point others to Jesus. Amen.

Meet the Author

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

Turn Sin Into Victory

“Have mercy upon me, O God, according to Thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of Thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions (Psalm 51:1 KJV).

The journey of the young shepherd David who killed Goliath and later in life became King and psalmist of Isreal is one of my favorite stories of redemption.

He committed adultery and murdered the woman’s husband—a husband who happened to be his friend and one of the top 37 warriors in his army. Every negative emotion engulfed him – guilt, shame, regret, depression, hopelessness.

Here are some ways David achieved victory over his sins, and we can too!

Ask for His mercy.

I love the King James version of Psalm 86:5. “For Thou, Lord, art good, and ready to forgive; and plenteous in mercy unto all them that call upon Thee (emphasis added).” Our Lord is forgiving and good and pours out His love to all who call to Him. The key here is to be intentional and actively call upon Him.

Let’s not kid ourselves here. God does not tolerate sin. He despises it. However, if a person will truly repent of that sin, He loves to be merciful in accordance with Psalm 51:1, “Have mercy on me, oh God.”

God is still merciful even though he may allow some of the consequences of sin to happen (as he did with David). However, His most profound nature is mercy. The Prodigal Son’s father ran to meet his son even before the son said a word. The son was actively seeking and walking toward the father.

Ask for His cleansing.

Our sins are like filthy rags to God. David’s sin was a stain upon him. He felt unclean in his heart. He knew that only God could clean and restore such a stain. So, he asked God to “wash me, and I will be whiter than snow” (Psalm 51: 7).

We all enjoy clean clothes, bedding, and a clean house. David desired a clean heart and wrote, “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.”

Many men enjoy the clean feeling after a hot shower and a shave. The real clean feeling occurs by having a clean heart and conscience that no longer plagues you.

Every gift needs a giver and a receiver. The cleansing of God must be requested and accepted in order to receive His cleansing and restoration. The Blood of Christ allows us to be presented to God as clean and without fault. Scripture teaches, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

Ask for His joy.

Scripture teaches that the wages of sin are death. A consequence of sin is also depression and guilt. A man without hope is spiritually dead. Victory over sin requires sincere repentance and restores a right relationship with God. David asked for joy as part of his prayer in Psalm 51:8. “Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice.”

Happiness comes and goes but the joy of the Lord is constant. However, we can not feel His joy when we are enslaved by negative emotions. An important step in turning sin into victory is to ask God to give us a renewed sense of joy. This joy is not happiness or giddiness, but the supernatural manifestation of a clean heart.

Ask for His joy, embrace it, and abide in it. Ask Him to open doors for ministry again.

Everyone reading this has overcome some sort of adversity in their life. We all have a story to share, but there is more to share. We can now use our story for ministry to others that are in the middle of the same valley that we have been.

Sin, mistakes, false accusations, and adversity do not define us. The Bible defines us and does so by telling us that we are all children of God. As His children, we all have been uniquely equipped by ministry – maybe its by our spiritual gifts or maybe it is by our past adversity. In either case, as long as we are alive, we have a ministry. Some people have told me in the past that they are physically unable to engage in ministry. I remind them that a powerful ministry awaits them by praying for themselves, family, friends, local church, evangelists, first responders, and government leaders.

Prayer: Dear God, Thank you for providing us a pathway to turn sin into victory. Thank you for your love and grace. Thank you for the blood of Jesus that has paid for our sins. Send your Holy Spirit to guide us as we navigate the pathway back to you after we sin. Amen.

Meet the Author

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

Choose Your Friends Wisely

“When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was” (Job 2:11-13 NIV).

We are called to show love to all of our neighbors. It is important to note that we can be friendly and show love without being friends. The selection of a friend is important and can have good or bad consequences. Proverbs 12:26 teaches, “The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.”

So, how can we make wise decisions in selecting friends? First, as with all decisions, begin with prayer. As one who is lacking wisdom in many, if not all areas of my own life, I lean heavily on James 1:5. “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”

Friends can help us in so many ways in life. In Luke 5, Jesus forgives and heals a paralyzed man because of the faith of his friends.

Friends who are like brothers help us in all seasons of life. Years ago, I gave a gift to a close friend of mine that reads, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity” (Proverbs 17:17). A true friend is a brother and a blessing.

Did you know that when a utility pole has lost its strength, it can sometimes be held upright by the immediately adjacent poles? Good friends can literally hold us up in times of adversity.

God has taught me a few lessons on friend selection, and I pray they are as beneficial for you as they have been for me.

A Friend Should Not Be Envious of You

An envious friend is not a friend, and certainly not one that “loves at all times.” An envious person will eventually be a disloyal person and commit betrayal. This problem is as old as Judas and Jesus. A true friend will rejoice as we rejoice and morn as we mourn.

A Friend Should Join Us in Seeking Our Lord’s Face

I am committed to growing in my Christian discipleship and each day I want to grow closer to our Lord. Those in my inner circle have the ability to help or hinder that growth. Some of my friends serve as a Paul to me, and I serve as a Timothy to others. In either case, we are all seeking a closer walk with our Lord. This is the THE most important common denominator. Our friendships have God in the middle and are a cord of three strands.

A Friend Should Not Be Envious of You

A Friend Should Join Us in Seeking Our Lord’s Face

Prayer: Dear God, Thank you for the friends that you have placed in our lives. Help us to select friends that help both of us grow closer to You and help us to end friendships that hinder our relationship with You. May we always remember what a friend we have in Jesus. Amen!

Meet the Author

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

Those Who Remember Their Past Victories Will Have More In The Future

“The Lord who rescued me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will rescue me from the hand of this Philistine” (1 Samuel 17:37).

My high school US History teacher displayed a quote on a sign adjacent to the chalkboard that read, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” This is a famous quote often attributed to George Santayana, a Spanish-American philosopher, essayist, poet and novelist.

Indeed, we can learn a lot by looking at our past. However, it is imperative to acknowledge that the past is for learning, not for living. Once the lesson has been learned, it is time to get back to the business of living in the present. None of us can heal any wounds from the past by exclusively focusing on the past. The giants of the past that have dealt us crushing defeats can only be slain in the present by looking ahead to the future.

Many of us are familiar with the story of David and Goliath, the giant Philistine, as detailed in 1 Samuel 17. David’s past at this time was that of a small, young shepherd with no battle experience. His immediate past also included listening to this champion for the Philistines come out each day to call upon anybody from the Israelites to accept his challenge for a one-on-one fight to the death. David accepted the challenge and used his knowledge of God to be equipped for his battle in the present. He leaned into a vital piece of information from his own past and understood that God had previously delivered him through tragedy and would do so again. 1 Samuel 17:37 reads, “The Lord who rescued me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will rescue me from the hand of this Philistine.”

David acknowledged the victory to come before it occurred. David said, “This day the Lord will deliver you into my hands, and I’ll strike you down and cut off your head. This very day I will give the carcasses of the Philistine army to the birds and the wild animals, and the whole world will know that there is a God in Israel” (1 Samuel 17:46).

David remembered his past and therefore was not condemned by it, but rather was empowered because he chose to remember his past with God. David was equipped by God because his focus was on God and not the giant before him. David was wisely taking his own thoughts captive and tuning all other voices that were surely present – society, self, and the enemy. He was modeling for us today what Paul would later write in Philippians 4:13. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”

The same God that empowered the young shepherd boy David also can empower all of us when our focus is on Him rather than whatever problem is present before us. The past is useful for learning, and if we acknowledge that the Hand of God was present in our past victories, then we can claim victory in the present in His name and wait with patience and confidence for the victory that is yet to come in the perfect time and manner in the future.

Prayer: Dear God, Thank you for your love, grace, and mercy. Thank you for Your Word and the story of David in 1 Samuel 17. Help us to remember Your presence in our past battles as we step into the battles of today. Grant us wisdom to realize that the battle belongs to You alone. Amen.

Meet the Author

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

Liked this post?

Attention Men! Stop And Be Grateful For The Blessings You Have Today

“But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, but My Father only” (Matthew 24:36 NKJV).

There is a focus in our society for “more.” Some of these desires can actually be healthy. I think we all want more Jesus in our lives and more peace, right? One of the “mores” I want is to make decisions that improve my overall physical health, strength, and agility daily. I have made good

progress, but I do not let this pursuit become an obsession, and I am not focused on some far-away fitness goal that robs me of the ability to enjoy today. I can attend church potluck dinners even though I might not have many healthy options. I can go to a Halloween party, have a moderate portion of candy, and not feel that I have ruined my diet, nor do I feel disappointed that I missed out on all the fun. The key is to focus on the right here and right now and ENJOY what and/or whom is right here and right now. This blog, as with most of my blogs, is essentially a sermon to myself with the hope that perhaps somebody else might benefit.

Life is lived now in the present tense. The present tense of the verb live is “living.” The past is for learning, not living. Life may or may not be lived in the future, and it is wise to prepare for the future, but we must remember that the primary purpose of today is living today. Easy to type into a blog, but hard to do for myself. Tomorrow is not promised, and Scripture teaches that none of us know the day or hour of our Healing.

Living today does not make us immune to troubles today. Matthew 6:24-34 is an excellent reminder about living today and not worrying about tomorrow. ‘“Therefore, I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you, by worrying, add a single hour to your life.”’

Some cannot move past the anger, shame, or hurt from the past. They need to understand that not only is the past for learning and not living, but they are a new person in Christ as taught in 2 Corinthians 5:17. “Therefore, if any man is in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things have become new.”

So, we have talked about the past and future, but what about the present? As we live today, adversity will undoubtedly come and challenge our ability to find joy in all circumstances. I certainly am unable to find joy in tragic circumstances. However, we can still live today and weep today as we stand steadfast on Psalm 30:5, “weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.”

Some have made their joy contingent on material things as they seek to store up treasure on earth rather than heaven. For example, some may say, “I will be joyful when/if …..” Spoiler alert: if your joy is contingent on anything rather than Christ, you will never have joy.

This drive for more can take our focus off the blessings of today because we are too busy preparing for tomorrow. If you have not read the Mary and Martha story lately, go read Luke 10:38-42 and ask yourself if you identify more with Mary or Martha.

Some people work all the time and essentially sacrifice living today for a better but unpromised tomorrow. The goal for many, including myself as a young man, was to work 24/7, ignore my health, and put in minimal time for my family, church, and friends because I needed to climb the ladder and be a better provider. Families need fathers who are present and engaged today and every day. Families also need fathers to take them to church today if today is Sunday joyfully. Friends need friends that they can talk to today if they are in a crisis. Life is to be lived today.

In our personal relationships, we may be blessed with a beautiful, godly woman to court and date, perhaps an ever so rare and virtuous Proverbs 31 woman. This type of woman is a God-sent blessing for any man. A smart man will recognize and enjoy the blessings that he has. A foolish man will not.

Many Christians love Jeremiah 29:11, which reads, “For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope.” It should go without saying, but since I am preaching to myself here, please notice that it is God with the plans for us, not vice versa. Also, the key to claiming these beautiful plans is not to push our own self-based agenda on God or others but rather to follow the wise teaching of the Psalmist. “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4).

On my better days, I follow the above Scriptures, and I pray each day that our Lord and Savior may grant me the wisdom to see, embrace, and give thanks for all the blessings that I have – today.

Prayer: Dear God, Thank you for all the blessings that you have so richly blessed me with. Forgive me for the times that I have ignored Your blessings of today in foolish pursuit of a self-perceived, self-focused blessing in the future. I confess that I have not honored You by not following Your teachings but instead have sadly tried to have You follow my plans. As the perpetual prodigal son, I am grateful that I can claim the promise of Your Word that every new morning brings fresh compassion from the LORD. Today, pour out Your Holy Spirit and create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right and steadfast spirit within me. Amen and Amen.

Meet the Author

Todd Shupe is a Men’s Ministry Specialist through the General Commission of United Methodist Men and a Certified Lay Speaker with the Louisiana Conference of the United Methodist Church. He is a Board Member for Gulf South Men, an Action Team member for The Kingdom Group, and a Board Member for the Lagniappe Country Walk to Emmaus. Todd is a Past President of the Baton Rouge District of United Methodist Men and remains active in this and many other local, regional, and international ministries. Todd is the proud father of Emma and Kyle and resides in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Additionally, he’s the author of the inspiring book “Fathering A Special Needs Child.” Todd also enjoys filling the pulpit for pastors to share the Good News of our Lord and Savior.

We welcome your comments below.

Thank you for visiting. We trust that you have enjoyed reading our articles.

The Ministry of Presence

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

Finding Purpose Beyond Work

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

Showing God on Valentine's Day

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

What Is The Best Christmas Present?

The Nativity Story

The Greatest Gift

The Gift of Time

Closing Reflection

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

Here I Am

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

Heart and Tongue

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

Turn Sin Into Victory

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

Choose Your Friends Wisely

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

Those Who Remember Their Past Victories Will Have More In The Future

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...

Attention Men! Stop And Be Grateful For The Blessings You Have Today

Liked this post?

Read more below or search for more topics...